It certainly did mine a few years ago.
Thankfully, I don't have a shy bone in my body now and I bitterly regret all the time I spent in excruciating, emotional pain.....
Today I want to tell you what the one thing I have learned about shyness and it's the most important lesson I can teach you:
Shyness doesn't exist.
Ok, so that's not quite true - what I mean is that shyness is something that only exists in your mind. No one can make you shy and you can't go out and buy a bagful of shyness either.
There's just one drawback though - shyness does have real and awful affects for those who find themselves in its evil grasp.
Quite a conundrum, don't you think?
So what about the 5 second trick I mentioned in the title of this post? What could possibly take so little time yet help overcome the shyness you feel?
Well, it's a trick that I use practically every day and although it takes a few goes to get comfortable with it, I can say with all certainty that it works!
Here it is:
Close your eyes and recall the last situation you were in where your shyness caused you a problem. Re-live how you felt. How would you describe yourself at that point?
Shy? Awkward? Useless?
Now shift your focus to the people around you, or the person you were talking to at the time. How would you describe them?
Confident? Able? In control?
I bet you won't say that they are shy though.
Now, here comes the trick:-
Swap places with that person in your mind. Make them the shy one and you the relaxed one.
Doesn't that feel better?
OK, so open your eyes now and realize that you are the very same person you were before the exercise. Nothing has changed about you in the slightest.
Except it has.
For a brief moment, you weren't shy. For a brief moment, you felt different, relaxed......maybe even confident.
And that's the real trick - the realization that you will be the same person no matter what or how you feel. You cannot change your skin, your hair, your weight or anything in the short and immediate term so you can do nothing other than accept who you are and learn to become comfortable with that acceptance.
Once you can do this, practice choosing not to be a shy person. You are who you are but you can choose how you are to be.
Of course, your feelings of shyness won't evaporate overnight but the trick is to be able to overcome those feelings and enable yourself to be a non-shy person.
Believe me, that's a big part of how I moved away from my restricting shyness and if you are willing to master the technique, it will be for you too.
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